Week 9 Preview – Swingers


Oct 13, 2013; Seattle, WA, USA; Seattle Seahawks cornerback Richard Sherman (25) and Seattle Seahawks strong safety Jeron Johnson (32) following an interception by Sherman against the Tennessee Titans during the fourth quarter at CenturyLink Field. Mandatory Credit: Joe Nicholson-USA TODAY Sports

Who is ready for some true Seattle football tomorrow?  As I write this, the wind is howling, the power’s gone out 3 times at the house this morning, and it’s been raining sideways.  While thankfully it sounds like it’ll calm down for tomorrow, you know those boys from Florida are nowhere near ready to deal with this kind of weather.

Have we all thoroughly calmed ourselves after Monday night?  I know it was an ugly, ugly win.  It most definitely put the spotlight on some glaring weaknesses with this team.  I take solace in the fact that even though the Seahawks brought their D-minus game to St. Louis, they were still able to win.  It definitely says something about a team that they’re able to do that after playing that badly.

Thankfully now we get the soft landing known as the Tampa Bay Buccanneers.  If there was ever a game where we can get healthy, here it is.  Let’s take a look in the crystal ball through the classic, Swingers.

“Hi, how are you ladies doing this evening? What do you drive?”: Wow, kind of gets right to the point, doesn’t it?  No messing around here.  Yes, the Seahawks looked as bad as we’ve seen probably since the game in Cleveland where Clipboard Charlie was forced into duty.  But as I touched on earlier this week, that was a stretch of four out of five games on the road, they went 4-1, and we now have five games here at home to end the season and I think we all know how that should work.

“So let me get this straight. The party started at eight. Why are we going to a bar at ten?”: A quick reminder to set your clocks back tonight.  Although if you don’t, I suppose the only issue is that you’d get to the game early as opposed to late.  I know we in Hawk Alley will be taking full advantage of our extra hour of tailgating tomfoolery.

“You know what you are? You’re like a big bear with claws and with fangs…”: And that goes over like a lead balloon with NFL players Greg Schiano.  I know you want to be the next Bill Parcells or Bill Belichick who rules with an iron fist and strikes fear into his players.  Well, you know why that worked for them and why it doesn’t work for you?  Oh, I don’t know, maybe because they win??! When you’ve yet to post a win, you may need to re-think your strategy.

“There’s nothing wrong with letting the girls know that you’re money and that you want to party.”: Just try to not pass along your staph infection to them.  Apparently Tampa’s keeping their facilites about as clean as a public bathroom in Calcutta.  Although, I shouldn’t joke.  I know what it’s like when you get a staph infection in your brain fluid, having gone through that last year.  Oh hell, never mind, it is funny.  Particularly when you know what those antibiotics do to you, it’s kind of funny thinking about that happening on an entire NFL team.  Picture the sounds from Austin Powers when he’s drowning the guy in the toilet.  Okay, now that you’ve lost your lunch, we’ll move on.

“You’re so money and you don’t even know it!”: Maybe Russell Wilson does know it, but it never hurts to emphasize.  This guy has taken an absolute beating the past few games behind that Division II offensive line.  Yet, he still makes plays.  Thankfully even when he leaves a pass about 10 yards short, he has receivers like Golden Tate to bail him out and turn it into six.  It would be awfully nice to see Russell be able to go out there tomorrow and look like he did the last four games of the regular season last year.  He needs that confidence boost as the New Orleans and San Francisco games loom in a few weeks.

“Excuse me darling. I’m sorry. Wow. I want you to remember this face here, OK, this is the guy behind the guy behind the guy.”: We may very well need the guy behind the guy at running back.  With word that Marshawn has a bit of a knee issue brewing, Turbin and Michael may see a lot more action.  The P-I reported yesterday that Lynch is still expected to play, but you know with the way he runs, there’s always the risk of aggravating an injury like that.

“I’m gonna make Gretzky’s head bleed for super fan 99 over here.”: Even though they risk fines, I thoroughly encourage the Legion of Boom to let off some of the steam in the general direction of Mike Glennon.  No, that’s not the ball boy for the Bucs, that’s actually their quarterback.  You’d be excused for confusing the two though.  Actually, I think he’s a dead ringer for Happy Gilmore’s caddy.

“You ready hip hop? You ready New Kids on the Block?”: You ready 12th Man?  You ready to make yet another unsuspecting victim feel your wrath?  I’m sure after Monday’s game, there’s some pent up energy that’s just waiting to be unleashed upon the Bucs.  Let’s get this Dare to Dream Express back on track.

Seahawks 31, Bucs 6