Top 12: Why It’s Better to Be a Seahawks Fan Than a Raiders Fan

facebooktwitterreddit

12. Seahawks fans communicate by turning words into sentences, both in writing and verbally. Raiders fans communicate in a series of loud grunts that even they don’t understand.

11. Pete Carroll seems like that fun uncle who always told funny stories and played catch with you in the backyard. Raiders Coach Tom Cable seems like the uncle your aunt left because he was always drunk and beat her.

10. The Raiders employ a grief counselor to help free agent signees adjust to becoming a Raider. Seahawks players are simply given a sun lamp to adjust to the weather.

9. Unlike Raiders fans, Seahawks fans don’t need a permission slip signed by their parole officer to attend games.

8. Everything Paul Allen touches turns to gold and everything the rat faced Al Davis touches turns to $#!^.

7. Even Matt Hasselbeck has more hair than Raiders quarterback Bruce Gradkowski.

6. If a player is cut by the Seahawks, they might catch on with another team. If a player is cut by the Raiders, even the Arena League will probably pass on them.

5. Unlike McAfee Coliseum, Qwest Field doesn’t serve hard alcohol to help Seahawks fans cope with the horrors of the 60 minutes of “football” to come each week.

4. The Seahawks will never re-sign Jeremy Stevens, but Al Davis has probably already offered him a lucrative, multi-year contract.

3. The Raiders have the second highest number of criminal incidents at their games (behind Philadelphia), and that’s not even counting their quarterback play.

2. The Seahawks never employed Lane Kiffin.

1. The Seahawks get better with each draft, not worse.

Ryan Nickum is a contributor to 12th Man Rising. He also publishes the blogs http://thisdayinbaldhistory.com, http://douchepon.com and http://hawkstrap.blogspot.com